if O-rings and seals are damged by the high oil temperature the oil temperature certainly is too high. have you found any relationship between the oil temperature and the ambient temperature and or the type of load on the system? if there is a relationship, a properly dimensioned cooler can solve the problem. if there seems no relation at all, the actual system should be investigated to see whether all the valves in the system are working as they should and especially whether they are closed when they should and not "nearly closed". in the latter case you might be pumping around oil through very narrow orifices which is a certainly a cause for overheating. usually a valve that is not working properly can be heard: it produces a "screaming/whining" sound. another item to look into is oil viscosity. both too high and too low a viscosity might lead to higher temperatures - what viscosity is used in the system and what is the ambient and oil temperature?