Boss did not support our position 3

[s0eebuch]

Hey all,

Looking for some advice from senior engineers. I recently had an issue where the contractor had interpreted our specifications in such a way as to omit some portion of the work.

After discussing in detail with my Boss, we agreed that the contractor's interpretation was incorrect and that I would draft a letter referencing the correct sections of the specification which indicated for the work in question to be done.

I wrote the letter and sent it out. The next morning I had a meeting so while I was out, the contractor emailed another set of questions to me and copied my Boss.

Without discussions involving either myself (the project engineer) or the client, she responded with the OPPOSITE position of that which I had indicated in my letter and which she and I had discussed the day before.

I'm very disappointed that my Boss choose not to support me in our postion to the contractor. When I presented her my concerns and requested that she "clarify the communication chain" to avoid this confusion in the future, she proceeded to blast me for my lack of respect of her position, her authority, and her knowledge.

At this point I'm confused and little unsure how to proceed. She's overly complicating a simple issue of "Why didn't you support our position to the contractor?" to beoome an issue of me questioning her authority - which I never have.

In fact, my entire point of seeking her council prior to responding to the contractor was out of respect for her authority and experience.

How can I explain to her that I need her to support me in order for me to do my job effectively? How can I further explain that my seeking her council is not a means of questioning her authority?

I don't want to involve any higher-ups as I don't want to come across as complaining - but I can't continue to put myself out there if she won't support me either.

Advice and direction would be most appreciated!

 

[KENAT]

I've had variations on this happen with several of my bosses (or other more senior colleagues) several times. In some cases it was because they found out other information, but then they would normally share that info with me.

Once it happens I move into 'management paralysis' mode for a while. I draft my comunications as Greg says then give them to the relevant party for review before sending them out. I find this usually delays projects fairly quickly, since the more senior folks usually have better stuff to do than proof read my missives.

Once you're able to point out a few times that the reason project XYZ is behind schedule is because you're waiting on the senior colleague/boss they'll usually (though not necessarily explicitly) give you the OK to go back to answering directly.

I've had stuff delayed months by this kind of thing, some to the point it gets forgotten about and never finished.

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[MedicineEng]

Can it be a case of "good cop, bad cop" without you knowing that you would be the bad cop until you found out in the worst way?
Or maybe she didn't had her stress pills that day)

 

[s0eebuch]

Update: I came in Monday and did a little of what Kenat suggested - "management paralysis". Not only that, I remained professional and courteous but cool (i.e. no pleasant chit-chat).

She was visibly unhappy and appeared to be worried most of the day. Perhaps worried at what follow-up action I might take?

I think her intent was to do the "good cop bad cop" routine but she never filled me in on the secret. I guess she thought it'd either work out for the best (dunno how) or I'd not figure it out. Either way, the methodology is ineffective at best (insulting at worst).

Meanwhile, we had a conference call yesterday with the contractor and the client. The contractor was amicable until the end, when he decided to rip into my boss. Apparently one of emails to him was rude and dismissive for no reason (I saw the email and agreed with him, quietly to myself of course). I felt for her and there were a few instances where I could have come to her aid, but I choose to "respect her authority" and not say a word.

Thanks again to everyone's support and excellent advice.

 

[mauricestoker]

Sounds like someone is on the bus and someone is going under the bus; I think you have the right approach, as I have been in the same situation many times. I also try to remember that when an elephant is being killed, you don't want to be caught in the grass around it.

I'd be willing to bet it won't be the last time. Live with it or get an MBA from Neal & Bob School of Management.

 

[s0eebuch]

I am currently working towards my Master's in Engineering Management. I am also half-way through the Project Manager's in-house certification (which is approved by the PMI also) and expect to have that complete next year.

Once these goals are attained, I plan to put in for my Boss' position.

Wish me luck!

;o)>

 

[mauricestoker]

Best of luck. I've been working pretty hard to stay out of management and generally been successful. Might be less money, but it means a lot to not have to say "Yum" every time something unsavory is placed on the plate.

 

[patprimmer]

Is that while she is still in her position.

Do you think maybe she already suspects that.

If so, that throws a very different light on what has been said so far in this thread.

Regards
Pat
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[s0eebuch]

Sorry, I should have clarified.

The office VP is slated to retire in the next 3 to 5 years.

My Boss and I have already discussed that, when the office VP retires, she intends to put in for his position and I would put in for her position.

The only problem with this scenario would be if she doesn't get the office VP position. But I put in (and am considered) for hers.

Would make an uncomfortable work environment.

 

[HgTX]

If she doesn't get the VP position, hers wouldn't be available to be put in for, would it?

Hg

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[patprimmer]

If she lacks confidence in getting the VP position and feels you might still get her position, the situation could be extremely uncomfortable or even hostile.

Regards
Pat
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[Mr168]

Poor managerial decisions, coming under fire from the client... sounds like she's making a vacancy for you without even having to consider that VP spot...

 

[corus]

Clearly the only answer is for you to apply for the VP position.


corus

 

[kontiki99]

s0eebuch,

I read the OP and honestly, I think you just got screwed. It happens.

I'm misquoting an old book, I think winning through intimidation? In any case, it identifies three types of people.

1 - People that say they want their cookies, and yours, and then proceed to try to take them.

2 - People that say they don't want your cookies, then proceed to try to take them.

3 - People that say they don't want your cookies, but somehow through incompetence or confusion wind up with your cookies.

The point is, if you valued your cookies you cannot distinguish one from the other. It's a lesson to be learned. In the future handle your affairs so no one plausibly has access to your cookies.

 

[shamsdebout]

Thanks for sharing this, in the event I am ever in such a situation I will remember this. I am curious, how do you feel about your boss technical skills?

 

[s0eebuch]

Thanks for all the advice. It's been almost two months and since the "incident" I've written of here, the relationship has been professional but cold. I actually prefer it as I can continue to keep my guard up. I realized that when Boss and I were chatting about life and family that I was letting my guard down (so to speak). I wonder if I could have seen the above situation coming?

Shamsdebout, my Boss is very competent technically. She is aware of her technical skills and is confident, almost to the point of arrogance - but not quite. She is also a very good project manager, a skilled negogiator, and a decent presenter.

 

[oneintheeye]

going by your last paragraph shes not reading this is she?

 

[s0eebuch]

LOL - I don't think so! I've spoken with her about this site and she doesn't *appear* to know of it at all.

Regardless, I do believe her to be a very competent engineer but not a good manager. Unfortunately, I've worked with (or for) very few good managers with engineering backgrounds. For some reason, in my experience, good engineers tend not to make good managers. Maybe that's just my perception.....

But, no, to answer your question - I am not writing these things thinking she's reading them.

 

[TenPenny]

"...my Boss is very competent technically. She is aware of her technical skills and is confident, almost to the point of arrogance - but not quite. She is also a very good project manager, a skilled negogiator, and a decent presenter."

Then it's quite possible that she had very good reasons for doing things the way she did. Perhaps there's a bigger picture that you're not aware of, since she is technically good and also a good negotiator.

 

[s0eebuch]

Tenpenny,

Entirely possible. But, if that is the case, then why not involve the Lead Engineer (me)?

If the issue is purely technical, then the Lead Engineer on the project should be involved.

If the Lead Engineer is/was not involved, then I can only assume the issue was anything but purely technical (i.e. personal, political, or managerial) - in which case the situation could have been handled better than to keep me in the dark, so to speak.

In other words, if there is a "bigger picture" that I cannot, for reasons of my position or whatever, be privy to - just say that. "Hey, know that there is a bigger issue here and I need to step in." Or something of that nature.

Instead, Boss plays sneaky and gets my suspicions up and then I have to endure her tirade after I ask questions. I'm an engineer - asking questions is what I do.