Funny Performance Review Comments 9

[ProtectionEngineer]

All,
It is odd and funny to see this close-out Performance Review comments. This person is leaving his current supervisor for better opportunity in the same company.

I am not sure this supervisor knows what he is writing and back-fired on him. Has anyone of you ever seen this type of comments from a supervisor? What are the right approach to reply this type of comments?

Is the supervisor got upset and shows his frustrations on this person?
Thanks.
A

The comments start here:
Mike tends to be too blunt when coaching others and providing feedback. He needs to show more consideration and sensitivity to others' feelings. His feedback feels more like direct criticism and this can make others feel angry or undervalued.

Damaging others' self-esteem does nothing to help the person understand and make necessary improvements and adjustments.

When Mike needs to give negative feedback to others, he needs to show empathy while offering support and guidance. This will give people the confidence to continue in their efforts to improve.

Mike tends to dictate change instead of introducing it in a positive, collaborative way. He doesn't listen to others' concerns or tolerate resistance. This puts people off and impedes the chances for successful implementation of the change.

Mike should try to empathize with people who feel loss or have other concerns as a result of change and offer ways to help individuals overcome their resistance.

 

[IRstuff]

So long as the brutality is fairly given, most people will tolerate that.

TTFN
faq731-376

 

[TheTick]

I worked with a guy who was the epitome of "cruel but fair". He managed the contract drafters. Non-performers were ruthlessly culled. Performers were retained and rewarded.

 

[srijey]

I don't see IRStuff's questions are answered by ProtectionEngineer. Some tips from my experience: Always log any incidents pleasant or unpleasant (normally that gets registered in your memory); do not respond to the performance evaluation right there, request sometime; think and go for one-on-one (this is not a Presidential election) with the evidence you've; remember a leader is not by position, is by talent; you control the stage only after first listening. Most of the time you tend to face with standard 'tutored' management phrases like business need, team player, not positive and so on. They may be subjective, but supervisors do not care. Prepare, prepare and prepare for those type of questions or statements. My short answer to ProtectionEngineer: The person who left Mike should face Mike in the first place, explain with evidence and walk away . Rememember, nobody is evil, only they are made by ignorance. Make use of that chance to show your skill. I prefer words to gun based on cost.

 

[ProtectionEngineer]

All,
Thanks for all your reply.

I suggested to Mike just reply to supervisor in a very simple sentenses.
"Supervisor's comments are purely unfounded's proofs.
These were soley his personal perceptions and speculations.
His comments were expressed out of personal frustration due to the fact
that his team members are leaving for better opportunities"

In this situation, it is better not to jump into the same muddy pond with supervisor.
No matter what you write it will still hurt the supervisor feelings.

Thanks.
A

 

[ScottyUK]

geordie87,

I think we may share a hometown.

.

 

[lacajun]

If Mike's problems are that significant, lots of people will know about them. That's been my experience. Managers can retaliate. I've experienced that a couple of times in my career. They weren't completely ineffective managers but they were having their issues and spreading the wealth. I wasn't the only one that experienced retaliation with one of those managers. Strange how managers think peons never discuss reviews enough to discern trends.

Depending on who asks, my truthful answer will vary in delivery.

ProtectionEngineer, I wouldn't say anything about a reason for his comments such as "frustration over subordinates leaving for better opportunities." That's conjecture thus dangerous ground in a War of Words.

Pamela K. Quillin, P.E.
Quillin Engineering, LLC

 

[Maui]

Based on the title of this discussion, I was expecting something more along the lines of the following examples. These are quotes from actual telephone company employee performance evaluations:

1. Since my last report, this employee has reached rock bottom and has started to dig.

2. I would not allow this employee to breed.

3. This employee is really not so much of a "has-been," but more of a definite "won't-be."

4. Works well when under constant supervision and cornered like a rat.

5. When she opens her mouth, it seems that it is only to change feet.

6. He would be out of his depth in a parking lot puddle.

7. This young lady has delusions of adequacy.

8. He sets low personal standards and consistently fails to achieve them.

9. This employee is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot.

10. This employee should go far - and the sooner he starts, the better.

11. Got a full 6-pack, but lacks the plastic thing to hold it all together.

12. A gross ignoramus - 144 times worse than an ordinary ignoramus.

13. He doesn't have ulcers, but he is a carrier.

14. I would like to go hunting with him some time.

15. He's been working with glue too much.

16. He would argue with a signpost.

17. He brings a lot of joy whenever he leaves the room.

18. When his IQ reaches 50, he should sell.

19. If you see two people talking and one looks bored, he's the other one.

20. A photographic memory, but with the lens cover glued on.

21. A prime candidate for natural de-selection.

22. Donated his brain to science before he was done using it.

23. Gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the train isn't coming.

24. Has two brains: one is lost and the other is out looking for it.

25. If he were any more stupid, he'd have to be watered twice a week.

26. If you give him a penny for his thoughts, you'd get change.

27. If you stand close enough to him, you can hear the ocean.

28. Some drink from the fountain of knowledge; he only gargled.

29. Takes him 2 hours to watch 60 Minutes.

30. The wheel is turning, but the hamster is dead.

With these kind of employees it's not really surprising that so many of the traditional telephone companies are finding it difficult to compete in the marketplace!

Maui

http://www.EngineeringMetallurgy.com

 

[IanME]

Maui - Hilarious! #18 had me spitting coffee!

"All models are wrong, but some are usefull" - George E. P. Box

 

[tygerdawg]

With these kind of employees

Sheesh. I doubt the problem is with the employees.

With snide sarcastic juvenile comments like those actually written by supervisors, the telephone companies must be hellish places to work. It's difficult, but not impossible, to herd a bunch of cats and properly motivate and energize one's employees without being a World Class Jerk about it. I suspect that is why there are so few good, decent, effective supervisors out there.

TygerDawg
Blue Technik LLC
Virtuoso Robotics Engineering

http://www.bluetechnik.com

 

[IRstuff]

Actually, #17 describes to a T an engineer I used to work with.

When she announced that she was leaving the company, we threw her a going away party, but inadvertently forgot to invite her ;-)

TTFN
faq731-376

 

[ivymike]

I think I've probably worked with her too... actually passed up my first supervisory opportunity (and possibly last) partly because i didn't want to be stuck supervising HER. (and apparently firing her was out of the question, because there had been sooooo many instances in the past where mere mortals would have been demoted and/or fired and yet she persisted in her role)

 

[IRstuff]

It was probably one of the best going away parties that I've attended. She was in the semiconductor industry, if that's of any help. She likewise knew how to play the discrimination card, being both female and Persian.

There's a whole book on how to provide double-meaning recommendations for people like that. At another company, we got snookered by an "she's an outstanding engineer" recommendation. Turns out she was an outstanding idjit engineer, who couldn't engineer her way out of the middle of a shift register. That was me, working as a tech, debugging a shift register, and her, a 20-yr experienced engineer, who couldn't fathom why the oscilloscope trace looked the way it did, when probing the middle of the shift register. So yeah, I would have had a comment that would have been on Maui's list.

TTFN
faq731-376

 

[urgross]

I really liked the listing.

My favorite from past experience is

The door opened with a jerk and he stepped in.

 

[GregLocock]

I think that list has been around on the intertubes ever since Al Gore invented them.

More seriously, if your organisation does advertise for, read the resume of, interview and select one of these types, does anybody ever go back and try and change the process so it doesn't happen again?



Cheers

Greg Locock


New here? Try reading these, they might help FAQ731-376

http://eng-tips.com/market.cfm?

 

[lacajun]

I've been thinking about my bosses. The best ones were kind, decent, and honest. I also learned the most from them.

Pamela K. Quillin, P.E.
Quillin Engineering, LLC

 

[pmover]

ProtectionEngineer,

i'm curious, why are you writing about someone else's evaluation?

i ask myself what qualities did the best supervisor i had are? integrity, honesty, and forthrightness. only one had these qualities. i recall getting scolded for something i said to another fellow non-engr employee (like "i'll kick your ass to the curb"). after walking out of the supervisor's office, i was relieved and felt more confident about myself simply because of the advice and encouragement provided. he recognized a weakness and provided the antidote, but with a final warning to never speak to others that way again. i honestly believed he would have terminated me if i did not acknowledge wrong-doing because he mentioned that I could be terminated.

it appears Mike's supervisor needs some coaching . . .

 

[Ron]

There's nothing wrong with being an a$$ when necessary. Others dictate the necessity.

 

[JimBlackwood]

" There's nothing wrong with being an a$$ when necessary. Others dictate the necessity."

I can't quite agree. Having btdt I can assure you that the only time it might not cause you more harm than good is when dealing with bullies and that is a special case where other optionsxare almost always available. Otherwise the harm it does you more than outweighs any potential benefit. There is no need to take my word for it however, just remember this caution. Time will demonstrate the truth of the principal.

Jim