How difficult it is for the LGBT people work in the Oil and Gas industry? 4

[Petroleum_engineer]

Hello Everybody,

Nice to talk with you all.

First of all, I apologize if I upset anyone with this post.

I am 29 yo, Eastern European and I am a petroleum engineer , activated mostly on drilling side within major Oil and Gas Service company.

I am Gay and I am in closet (conservative country).

In these years of work, I had the chance to work in the Middle East as well for short assigments: KSA and UAE. As a gay person, I am mad that I am eager to find something permanently in those countries? Would like to hear your honest advise.

PS: Actually, 2 months ago I declined an offer for UAE as I had second thoughts and somehow got infuenced by people around me. So now I am full of remorse and regrets. If anybody can guide me or give me any advise in finding other opportunities, I will appreciate very much your help and support.

PS2: As a petroleum engineer I find very difficult to make friends from same industry, so whoever wants …we can connect and discuss further.

TIA

 

[IFRs]

Your skills are your ticket to get ahead, not your sexual orientation.

 

[Petroleum_engineer]

Thanks for the encouraging words, but as you know, labels are placed based on sexual orientation in certain industries

 

[IFRs]

I pretend to live in in a fantasy world, you can not.
I wish you the best.

 

[Petroleum_engineer]

Thank you. Best of luck to you too.

 

[LittleInch]

The ME is a conservative set of countries with some fairly frightening laws and attitudes to LGBT people.

If you chose to work there then you need, IMHO, if not to respect their laws and customs, at lease acknowledge them and avoid conflict wherever possible, i.e. don't flaunt your sexuality in front of the locals, or indeed for that matter your work colleagues, many of whom may come from equally restrictive and conservative countries and cultures.

It's your business, not theirs, so as long as you do your work well and perform in your team then you shouldn't have any issues. Of course in the way of things and conversations, people may suspect, but you can play the girlfriend at home card if needed. Then go on holiday to wherever you want and do whatever you want so long as it's legal and no one will know or even care.

Basically keep your sexuality out of the workplace or public gaze and there should be no issue.

My experience is that there are more than the fair share of people with errrr, rather strange lifestyles out in places like that in the O&G industry. Many are literally dying off, but the number of rather odd people you meet is higher than normal so you won't stand out unless you go in with a rainbow coloured head band and start playing the village people on repeat with a bushy moustache and tight wight vest top...

Apart from rule no 1 - Don't get caught, Rule no 2 is You're in THEIR country voluntarily and getting paid for it. If you don't like it / can't stand the loneliness, a plane leaves every day. A few people I knew out there left to go on vacation and just never came back...

You found one job in the UAE so you can find another. It's not hard and the turnover can be quite high so vacancies appear all the time. Just set yourself a goal - either time or money accumulated and then stick to it as it can become addictive, especially if you're working hard in remote / offshore locations.

Good luck and next time maybe the "how to improve myself" forum might be a better one.

Remember - More details = better answers
Also: If you get a response it's polite to respond to it.

 

[1503-44]

IMO, living in a place where that's illegal and the punishments are not very nice isn't worth the risk or anxiety. And in a way, you are agreeing with their perspective and actually supporting their phobias. I'm sure you will be happier with the alternatives that are sure to come along soon. The Oil price is rising. Hang in there. You have experience.

I didn't want to go on vacation, cause going back got to be so depressing. Don't let it get to that point. If you go back, don't ever stop working on the escape plan.

--Einstein gave the same test to students every year. When asked why he would do something like that, "Because the answers had changed."

 

[LittleInch]

Yes, but if you don't actually do anything "illegal" then there is no real risk. You can't be caught for ideas that are just in your head.

In places like the UAE and almost certainly Dubai, there will be underground gay bars and locations where like minded people meet up, but that's when you would be at risk.

If you can avoid that and don't try to form any relationships at work then I think the chances of being caught are very low indeed.

And NEVER get involved with the locals. They will throw you under the bus so fast you wouldn't even see it coming.

Yup once the going back starts to be an issue then it's time to get out, even if your boat hasn't reached its optimum length (A driller told me once every month he stayed added a foot tot he length of the boat he was going to buy / build. Problem was he didn't know how long he wanted the boat to be....

Remember - More details = better answers
Also: If you get a response it's polite to respond to it.

 

[1503-44]

They have way of getting things out of your phone and your head and real evidence isn't a problem either. But he knows all that. He's lived there. He's resisting. Must be for a good reason.

--Einstein gave the same test to students every year. When asked why he would do something like that, "Because the answers had changed."

 

[Petroleum_engineer]

Thank you for your sincere and honest answers. You are right in everything you say.

On the other hand, as I said in my post, I had the opportunity to work in such Middle Eastern countries, but only for short assignments (not full relocation). You will be surprised that most of the locals are part of this LGBT community, of course secretly... Everything they do is against their religion and culture, but the appearances show something completely different, which seems downright superficial to me.

But I completely agree, if you live in such a country, you must obey its rules.

I'm not the type to stand out, but anyone can suspect me and create problems. Arabs are not the easiest people to deal with. They can back stab while smiling at you (of course, there might be exceptions as well).


The idea is that ME can be a launching pad for your career, but on the other hand you have to give up your personal life ,as definitely you cannot have a stable relationship in such circumstances .

You mentioned Dubai, where there everything is more open but indeed...you still have to take the risk and be careful, that's why I've concentrated more to UAE, rather than KSA where they are much stricter.

Much appreciated your help on this topic, which for many is not "comfortable".

 

[1503-44]

I'd be more worried about the extortion-blackmail thing, not so much from locals as other expats. You are vulnerable on many fronts. I don't know UAE law. Could you be jailed and (hopefully quickly) deported on suspicion alone?. The technicalities could get tricky. The Saudis old religious police were good at that. They even have members of the royals under house arrest for several years now. No judge, trial, or phone calls.

--Einstein gave the same test to students every year. When asked why he would do something like that, "Because the answers had changed."

 

[Petroleum_engineer]

I don't know such details either.

So, I've heard stories, but I don't know how many are real and how many are made up.

Things, in general, seem to have changed. KSA announced that it also accepts members of the LGBT community for tourism purposes.

However, it seems that they have evolved in (hope so)

 

[LittleInch]

When I worked in KSA, many years ago, whenever you heard of someone being arrested etc, you then found out that they had often been warned about their behaviour and been very open with their behaviour. There was always a back story.

Keep it quiet, don't attract attention and you'll be fine.

How you deal with your personal life is up to you. The are often 6 month contracts on offer and like I said even if its longer many people just go on holiday and don't come back. You might lose a final bonus but money isn't everything

Remember - More details = better answers
Also: If you get a response it's polite to respond to it.

 

[1503-44]

I lived there 10 yrs in the Magic Kingdom. 2yrs in Dubai. (Actually 9 countries for more than a yr). KSA is trying to whitewash their human rights history. You can even play golf there. I heard even a single woman can get a visa now. But what gov says doesn't change what the cop in Buraydah or Jizan thinks. It was the only place I saw a public execution. Quite by accident that was, but I still have difficulty looking at watermelon. Execution for whatever, even nonviolent crime, including sorcery or blasphemy. Serious business.

Tourism? Go to Egypt, Turkey or Morocco. Shopping? Dubai. Most stories are probably real. Stoning is still a thing. Working? Don't work for Petrofac UAE!

--Einstein gave the same test to students every year. When asked why he would do something like that, "Because the answers had changed."

 

[Petroleum_engineer]

Omg, it's awful to see a public execution. You probably stay with dry spells for the rest of your life, which is not good.

Unfortunately, working at a service company (green color), it is difficult to find opportunities with beneficiaries, such as the monsters Aramco or Adnoc. Also being young, only 29 yo, I don't have very high hopes... because of the experience.

So for the time being, as a secondary option, still service companies remain viable.

Dubai is always the best option for everything in my opinion, when we are talking about GCC countries

 

[1503-44]

Took me 2 yrs to get rid of the PTSD attacks.

I liked Oman. They're a bit more laid back there. Dubai is all traffic. Took 6 hours to get a cab after the fireworks on new years eve.

--Einstein gave the same test to students every year. When asked why he would do something like that, "Because the answers had changed."

 

[Petroleum_engineer]

I'm glad you managed to get over it.

Never been or worked in Oman physically, only worked with them remotely.

But yeah, I've heard that is a nice place and their coast is beautiful.

 

[Morcuse]

I've found myself in the same situation a couple of times this year. I'm a Mechanical Engineer. Ultimately, I decided that sacrificing my personal life for a job was not worth it - I'm in a stable relationship thus, my partner would not have been able to come with me.

 

[Petroleum_engineer]

thanks for sharing this with me.
I hope you are happy with the decision you made. Definitely the personal life should be on 1st level, totally agree with you.

The situation is different for me, being alone. But I can't even get my hopes up that I can find someone stable in such countries/cultures

 

[shvet]

I have checked - the last topic at this thread counted for the same amount of replies was 2 years ago. Personal issues attract more attention that engineering. This is not normal, man, this is not normal. This community is sick some kind of.