OverWorked/Bullied/Blackmailed 14

[Space213]

Hi guys,


What would you guys do if you find yourself as the only one In a small start up company that is overworked and also the victim of being bullied and blackmailed for being fired or by your boss? he is one of those terrible bosses that gets a kick out of making fun of you.

Im designed 2 machines that are heavily selling and its our job to get the machined parts and assemble them with our shop guys and send em out. My boss has labeled me as the Owner of these designs and slowly has taken advantage of my ambition and has put a ton of stuff on my shoulders.
Nobody is forced to work as hard as i am in this small company but now i am getting demoralized.
I need 3 alarms to wake up in the morning. They dont let me breathe at work for a second while other employees screw off all the time or dont have near the amount of responsibility as me. They have some type of relationship where they dont get to deal with crap where im always getting beatdown for something.
I stay late to design and build the units but theres no appreciation for it.
I get yelled at for things that arent in my control and its just becoming exhausting.

I want a new job but its my first engineering job and i am 2 months away from 1 yr of exp. I really just cant do this anymore and i randomly get blackmailed for me getting fired but it never happens.

What is going on you feel?

 

[SWComposites]

You have two choices, put up with it or quit. Your choice. Make a decision now.
Life is too short to put up with that nonsense.
You have an engineering degree (presumably) so you have many other opportunities.

 

[Space213]

I do have a BSME/EIT. I dont get why its so unbalanced, the engineer before me had to design much simpler items and has this type of relationship with the CEO and my boss to where no matter how much he bullshits on the job or does just easy paper pushing work he will never get fired. The unstable job security blackmail they put is always on me regardless of the fact the 2 machines i've designed for them is selling and making them the most money for the past 6 months.

I am never late to work and only took 1 sick day since i've started. People at my workplace are not nearly pushed to work as hard as I am and if they have to work hard they get into a fit and show they bad mood all day.

My boss wants me to be on top of not only the design (which is my main and only job) but I am blamed for all relevant documentation related to the designs not being updated or corrected when I am busy helping the shop guys learn how to build my machine and ship them out to customers and also update drawings as much as possible. It gets really difficult to put out fires on the daily when its all left on you.

I welcome the handwork dont get me wrong I come from an entrepreneur background where I am used to running around putting out fires and managing my own product but when you mix in blackmailing job security and bullying its not fair.
I will be looking for a new job but its only been 1 year at the very least i've had any real life engineering experience.

 

[RVAmeche]

If it's a small startup company as you mentioned, they're likely just trying to milk your ambition for what it's worth. Your response to this could be no, that's not my job; okay, but give me a raise/promotion to reflect these new duties; or quit.

It sounds somewhat toxic to me.

 

[SuperSalad]

At some point you either take a stand or you don't.

If you do take a stand and demand change, it could generally go one of two ways.

If you don't take a stand and demand change, it seems there is only one way it will go.

Andrew H.

http://www.mototribology.com

 

[KoachCSR]

My two cents: Start looking for another job yesterday based on what you've described.

The job market, in general, is excellent right now for engineers - including mechanicals. I'm not sure what industry you're aspiring to stay in or move into, but my personal opinion is that one spends WAY too much time at work not to enjoy it. No potential employer will bat an eye at a job move from you right now; they'll rack up your current position to you looking for a position after graduation and taking what you could get at the start-up...I would recommend downplaying the toxic nature of your current work environment while expounding on the many responsibilities you've taken on to a potential employer to prevent giving them the wrong impression.

Best of luck.

 

[moltenmetal]

I don't understand this "blackmail" bit. Is the boss threatening to tell other people that he fired you if you were to leave?

I agree with the others here: it's time to bail out. Life's too short to put up with abuse, and the likelihood that being assertive now is going to fix your situation on the job and make it long-term survivable is fairly low given your description of the people involved. If it weren't, that would be the absolute first course of action.

If you're ready to go anyway, giving them a list of conditions under which you'd be willing to stay (regular hours, better treatment and support etc.) can't hurt.

 

[berkshire]

You need to quietly find another job without using the company you are working for now as a reference. Then having found a job. LEAVE!
I am sorry to say it, but this is one bridge you need to burn. Nobody should have to put up with that treatment.
B.E.


You are judged not by what you know, but by what you can do.

 

[Compositepro]

I believe the OP means that he is being "threatened" with being fired.

 

[Space213]

Thanks for the advice guys.

Its just there are good days but then there are many days especially now where I am being over stressed to do tons of work and my boss will at times throw it out that you can be replaced anytime but says it in clever ways.

Its an open atmosphere but at the same time I am the one who seems to be treated with the lowest job security even though my product designs are showing to be most successful for the company right now..

I will just have to find a new job but do it discreetly. I took a lot of shit and disrespect from my boss he cusses out otherpeople too but nothing close to how bad he treats me.

 

[12345abc6ttyui67]

Not excusing the behaviour. But are the other guys older / more experienced?

This might simply be the bosses way of 'breaking you in'. Maybe the others have already gone through that process with the boss? Some bosses want to know your limits, and where your boundaries are. They'll push until they find them, and then let off because they understand how much you can take and have seen how you respond under pressure.

But I would be finding a new job and leaving. I'd maybe have a ludicrous list of demands (like double the average salary for the job, plush company car and whatever else) ready in case they asked what would it take for me to stay. But even then I'd probably go.

 

[Rputvin]

Find a new job. Or find a way to make this one work. The amount of stress you've got WILL catch up with you if you don't find a way to reduce it.

I was in a similar situation, except there was never any threat to let me go. It was my first real "career" job out of college, designing systems and products. I was brought on to supplement the engineer they had and quickly displaced him, allowing him to move up in the company. A quick year of exceeding expectations, followed by a few more years of too much work and stress. Overtime to just stay above water, zero down time while at the office, no vacation/time off, working from home on nights and weekends, while "management" might be bothered to show up in the office once a week while working from home the rest. It finally came to a head when I demanded a raise and leveraged another job offer to get it- followed quickly by another elevation in my responsibilities and a shift in structure that put the company VP as my boss. I was told I had a job as long as I wanted. 6 months later, trying to juggle too many projects that had too little management, the owner put some outrageous demands on me, which I ignored, and was fired outright.

It was 5 years, and looking back I had formed all kinds of unhealthy habits. Not having a good home/work/health balance means you're making compromises somewhere, and for me it meant letting my health and home suffer needlessly.

Funny enough, when he let me go I was overjoyed. I didn't start looking for another job until I had done some traveling and enjoyed a few months of worry-free life.

It was tremendous experience, I will admit. I am now ahead of my peers in terms of "growth" as an engineer, something you don't even realize you need coming out of college and working in your 20's.

 

[ctopher]

I had a job like that once. I stood up to the boss. I had some respect after that. He was still a jerk, but had some more respect from him after.
I got in his face and literally told him to f-off. Knowing that he needed me for the job and he wouldn't fire me on the spot.
Like the others said, it's up to you. Do something about it, or quit.

Chris, CSWP
SolidWorks '17
ctophers home
SolidWorks Legion

 

[IRstuff]

You should consider a corollary situation, domestic abuse. Predators and abusers have a "preyDAR," that can home in on potential victims.

Somehow, you managed to to show up as a blip on their preyDAR and they hired you, and not others. Whether you continue to be abused is up to you, but know that you need to make fundamental changes within to avoid showing up on someone else's preyDAR

TTFN (ta ta for now)
I can do absolutely anything. I'm an expert!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BKorP55Aqvg

faq731-376 forum1529 Entire Forum list

http://www.eng-tips.com/forumlist.cfm

 

[HLE111]

I was in the exact situation except with structural building design rather than product design. I was a young lead structural engineer in a small start-up company under pressure from my boss in the same manner as you've described.

The personal comments, threats and attacks really got to me at first but as I evaluated my self-worth by my accomplishments it was much easier to keep calm during these exchanges and resolve conflict. I've noticed a trend in younger professionals where when there is heavy conflict discussion they will remain quiet and not speak their mind even when they're in the right. I've never done this, never compromised and always participated in these heavy discussions in a very respectful and calm manner knowing I may get fired. It may be the reason why I'm now close friends with my boss and we have a good relationship, I don't suggest running away from conflict because it'll just find you elsewhere but I do not know your situation completely to be able to give an ultimate answer.

However, if you really are feeling extremely uncomfortable then I suggest to keep searching as you try your best to work through the issues day to day.

Stay calm and just deal with it each day as you search for a new job.

 

[CANPRO]

I've noticed a trend in younger professionals where when there is heavy conflict discussion they will remain quiet and not speak their mind even when they're in the right. I've never done this, never compromised and always participated in these heavy discussions in a very respectful and calm manner knowing I may get fired.

Can't agree with this more. This is the kind of situation you can't prepare for in school. The sooner you can learn to do this the better. Always listen, respect what people have to say, but don't be afraid to speak up when you know what you're talking about. In my first few years out of school I had a few conversations with clients/boss that made me feel like I was going to throw-up because I was so nervous, but I'm much better for it and now I can hold my own in those situations easily. And along the same lines, own your mistakes if they're yours but don't take someone else's crap just because you're a convenient punching bag. Tough situation, I wish you the best.

 

[monkeydog]

My first job out of collage I had a similar boss - but not as bad.
I finally got another job, 10% increase (but I would have taken the same salary).
After I gave my notice, my boss asked me how much more I was getting (in an open office area). I told him 10%, he told be I was getting shafted if i don't get at least 20%. He later asked me if I would stay if I got a salary increase. I told him sure 20%. He said "What? 20% what your making now?" I told him "No 20% over what I will be making at the new place."
That felt sooo good.

 

[271828]

Look for another position. When you're interviewing, be gentle on criticism of the place you're leaving.

I'd do this soon. When you apply for PE licenses in 2-3 years, some states will require a reference by your current and previous supervisor. I'd put a supervisor or two between me and this guy. It sounds like you'll need more colleagues that can serve as references, also.

Finally, a couple of book recommendations: Extreme Ownership and Dichotomy of Leadership by Willink and Babin. They have a lot to say about responsibilities at all levels. There might be some things you're doing that aren't helping the situation. You would also get information on how they're supposed to be acting as leaders.

 

[Space213]

Appreciate everyone's advice..Im thinking I will just tough it out and get better because if I don't improve myself the same problems will come up in the next situation.

Thank you for the book recommendation I will definitely read it

 

[Maui]

Sounds like your boss is a bit of a jerk. The only way to deal with bullies is to stand up to them. This doesn't mean having to have an angry public exchange between you and him. Although I did do this once with a VP at dinner in a restaurant full of patrons and in front of a dozen other employees, including the VP of Human Resources (a retired marine) who oddly enough treated me incredibly well from that point forward. The other employees were afraid that it was going to lead to a fist fight (it didn't), and without me even realizing it I cleared the table. I was very direct and clear in communicating to him how angry I was. And he backed off. I was not fired, but if I had been at that point I wouldn't have even cared.

Stand up for yourself. Don't expect anyone else to do it for you. People can dislike me as much as they please (many on this board probably do) but I demand to be treated respectfully. You should too.

Maui