Hi everyone, hoping to get some input on a career decision that is eating me up inside. I'll try to be as succinct as possible.
I am in my early 30s. I worked for a small firm from the time I was in school until middle of last year doing strictly residential work. Wasn't making tons of money there ($82k salary), but I thought what I was making was fair. I left the firm last year to start my own firm doing the same thing (residential engineering), mostly because I thought the owners of the firm were the worst people I've ever known in my life, but also for the potential added benefit of making more money on my own.
I've been out on my own for nearly a year and things have been going better than I thought they would at the start. I have a couple of clients that make up about 80% of my business right now, and then random contractors/architects/homeowners making up the rest. Revenue for the first year is $140k. After taxes, that's quite a bit more than I was making before. I haven't done any marketing because I haven't needed to so far. I've had plenty of things to do with engineering, running the business, etc. I figure that at maximum capacity my revenue could be somewhere between $170k-$200k before I'd need to bring someone on to help. The thought of hiring people scares me to death and I don't know if I would pursue that route if I got super busy.
A major issue for me right now is that I don't have any co-workers to discuss engineering questions with. I have 10 years of experience in this industry so it's not like I don't know what I'm doing, but as I'm sure you have experienced, each job has its own new little challenges or things you haven't seen before. I miss having engineers around me that I could discuss these challenges with so we could try to come to a consensus on what the best thing to do would be. The discussion boards here have been helpful on some of the questions I have had, but it's not the same as working with other people in an office. I am a perfectionist, which has been to my detriment working on my own. I stress about the smallest details, even details that I know won't matter all that much in the grand scheme of the structure. I live in mortal fear of messing something up, missing a spot footing, making a mistake that will cost someone their life, etc. I have insurance of course, but that doesn't make me feel any better. I believe that I am a good engineer, but an irony on being on my own is that the more I learn and the more I research and the more books I buy, the less I feel I know. I am plagued by self-doubt. Going out on my own I completely expected the stresses that come with running your own business, but I was not prepared for this side of it.
Due to the issues described, I have thought maybe I should just go back to working for someone else. I think, "That way I have people to discuss my questions with." I say to myself, "That way I can come home at the end of the day and not get ulcers thinking about this or that tiny little detail that I'm not 100% confident in." On the other hand, I'd make less money, and I'd feel like a failure for giving up on something that was going quite well. I used to read 2 books a month for fun, but since starting this company I haven't read a single book for fun since I'm always working on the business or stressing about this and that. I think to myself, "Maybe I should go back to the 9-5 and get my life back"...I have friends at a couple of other firms in the area who have let me know that there's always an opening for me at their firm if I'm interested. So my questions are...
- Am I crazy for thinking about going back to being a regular employee? I'm making way more $$$ on my own than I could if I went back. I'm my own boss, for goodness' sake! I can do whatever I want!!
- Those of you who are out on your own, do you miss having a support system? Do you regret going out on your own at all?
- Are any of you constantly plagued by self-doubt? Were you able to overcome that? Advice on changing my personality so I can enjoy the ride a little bit more?
- Any other thoughts?
I would really appreciate any feedback that you all have. This decision is really tough because no matter what I do I feel like I will regret my choice and wish I had chosen the other thing. Give it to me straight, I value your experience and opinions.
I am in my early 30s. I worked for a small firm from the time I was in school until middle of last year doing strictly residential work. Wasn't making tons of money there ($82k salary), but I thought what I was making was fair. I left the firm last year to start my own firm doing the same thing (residential engineering), mostly because I thought the owners of the firm were the worst people I've ever known in my life, but also for the potential added benefit of making more money on my own.
I've been out on my own for nearly a year and things have been going better than I thought they would at the start. I have a couple of clients that make up about 80% of my business right now, and then random contractors/architects/homeowners making up the rest. Revenue for the first year is $140k. After taxes, that's quite a bit more than I was making before. I haven't done any marketing because I haven't needed to so far. I've had plenty of things to do with engineering, running the business, etc. I figure that at maximum capacity my revenue could be somewhere between $170k-$200k before I'd need to bring someone on to help. The thought of hiring people scares me to death and I don't know if I would pursue that route if I got super busy.
A major issue for me right now is that I don't have any co-workers to discuss engineering questions with. I have 10 years of experience in this industry so it's not like I don't know what I'm doing, but as I'm sure you have experienced, each job has its own new little challenges or things you haven't seen before. I miss having engineers around me that I could discuss these challenges with so we could try to come to a consensus on what the best thing to do would be. The discussion boards here have been helpful on some of the questions I have had, but it's not the same as working with other people in an office. I am a perfectionist, which has been to my detriment working on my own. I stress about the smallest details, even details that I know won't matter all that much in the grand scheme of the structure. I live in mortal fear of messing something up, missing a spot footing, making a mistake that will cost someone their life, etc. I have insurance of course, but that doesn't make me feel any better. I believe that I am a good engineer, but an irony on being on my own is that the more I learn and the more I research and the more books I buy, the less I feel I know. I am plagued by self-doubt. Going out on my own I completely expected the stresses that come with running your own business, but I was not prepared for this side of it.
Due to the issues described, I have thought maybe I should just go back to working for someone else. I think, "That way I have people to discuss my questions with." I say to myself, "That way I can come home at the end of the day and not get ulcers thinking about this or that tiny little detail that I'm not 100% confident in." On the other hand, I'd make less money, and I'd feel like a failure for giving up on something that was going quite well. I used to read 2 books a month for fun, but since starting this company I haven't read a single book for fun since I'm always working on the business or stressing about this and that. I think to myself, "Maybe I should go back to the 9-5 and get my life back"...I have friends at a couple of other firms in the area who have let me know that there's always an opening for me at their firm if I'm interested. So my questions are...
- Am I crazy for thinking about going back to being a regular employee? I'm making way more $$$ on my own than I could if I went back. I'm my own boss, for goodness' sake! I can do whatever I want!!
- Those of you who are out on your own, do you miss having a support system? Do you regret going out on your own at all?
- Are any of you constantly plagued by self-doubt? Were you able to overcome that? Advice on changing my personality so I can enjoy the ride a little bit more?
- Any other thoughts?
I would really appreciate any feedback that you all have. This decision is really tough because no matter what I do I feel like I will regret my choice and wish I had chosen the other thing. Give it to me straight, I value your experience and opinions.