forgetfull boss 4

[xJAyx]

I work for a very small company where I am the only full time designer/project manager, and my Boss is the owner. He is an experienced instrumentation engineer, I am a junior electrical engineeer (1/2 year from my PE). We have two very experienced technicians and several other assembly type people on a contract basis. My boss mostly focusses on business development and sales efforts.
The problem is my boss has a very bad memory. It's not such a big deal, but there are two things that really bug me. The first is that he explains project backgrounds to me more than once. Sometimes many times, he also does this with his vision for the company etc.
The second is the one that really gets me. If I am facing a problem and I am talking it over with him, or he is explaining a new project to me, and I have a good idea,it is not unusual that next time we are talking about the project he suggests my idea to me. The thing is that he actually believes he came up with it, because he doesn't remember me telling him.
Is this just a fact of life for a junior engineer? All the previous company's I have worked for have not had this problem, but they have also not been this small. What do you all think?

 

[HgTX]

Given that it's a small company, would it seem obnoxious if after major conversations you sent him a summary memo? You could say it was just to make sure you understood everything properly.

That way when your ideas come back to you from him, you can say, "Yes! I'm glad you're still in favor of that! You did seem to like it when I brought it up last time; here are the details we settled on." And who knows, maybe seeing it again in writing might anchor it better in his brain so he doesn't forget as much to begin with.

Hg

 

[makeup]

Put your ideas on a diagram or in writing. He can't say that he was responsible then. The problem you are having is that you are trying to get credit, this is normal and everyone especially when in a new role does it. Keep up the good work but learn to accept that if he is taking your ideas on board you are making a mark, just not the way you would like. My boss does the same. If I told him that I was struggling to get back to a client he will recite all the textbook answers, which to me is teaching me to suck eggs and yes it really winds me up. Not many companies will openly pat you on the back.

 

[profengmen]

Sounds to me like he has a problem that only a Doctor can treat. Understand that he is sick, and work around his disability.

Just keep that in mind.

 

[PSE]

xJAYx,

Send your boss follow up memo's or E-mails. They will provide you a library of documentation of your ideas and may serve to help keep your boss on track. One of the plusses (if you can stand not necessarily getting credit for it) is that once your ideas become his, they are much more likely to get approved and implemented.

Regards,

 

[plasgears]

Reminds me of my last boss, a QC type, who was filling a Mgr/Eng position. I would make excellent suggestions, and he would find several reasons why they could not be implemented. Weeks later, I could hear discussion of these same ideas in the hall as though they were his.

One was a company publication of designs that did not work out in practice. At GE many years ago, it was an inch thick and full of designs that had to be fixed. It was very instructive. Although negative at first look, it contained designs that superceded the weak designs.

The guy was a son of a B, and I gave him the blast to the facility chief on my way out. I am happy in my current position.

 

[chaelp]

I've had the same problem also and I agree with profengmen that depending on age, it could be Alzheimers. Keep an eye on him and if his forgetfulness gets worse, I would politely mention it and suggest that he get tested.

 

[MikeHalloran]

Sometimes I find myself explaining my vision to junior people, more than once, because I'm convinced that they didn't 'get it' the first time, or the tenth time.

Being patient and nice and gracious is a politically correct substitute for loudly and publicly questioning the subordinate's competence, intelligence and ancestry.

I really don't like the other politically correct teaching method, letting them go ahead and screw things up, and making sure they get full credit for the consequences, because the cleanup is always expensive for the company.

;---

Sure, Alzheimer's might be a possibility, but mentioning it to the putative victim could be a Career Decision, in several possible ways. I don't see an upside for you in discussing it with the boss, true or not.

;---

You need to consider the possibility that the old guy is really okay, likes you, and is trying to help you, and you are not 'getting it', that your ideas are half- baked, or old recipes in disguise, etc.

;---

The technicians probably know the real deal, but for them, everything they say or do is a Career Decision, so you may have to get them off site, and drunk or mad, in order to learn what they are really thinking.







Mike Halloran
NOT speaking for
DeAngelo Marine Exhaust Inc.
Ft. Lauderdale, FL, USA

 

[gegio1960]

I repeatedly observed that behavior, mainly in managers but also in young engineers with ambitions and "managerial skills"..... it is not a matter of Alzheimer or other mental disease.

 

[Slugger926]

Been there, done that from both sides.

Your boss has way too much on his plate and isn't delegating enough therefore causing the memory lapses. This is normal with anyone trying to do too much.

As others have stated, you need to follow every conversation with confirmation emails. I learned this from some of my best managers. Then when your boss tries to say that your idea was his, then you can refer him back to your emails. This will aslo be a reminder for him so he won't be rehashing past conversations.

Good luck.

 

[unclesyd]

One thing about the problem of older people being forgetful and in a position of authority, it ain't gonna happen any more under the current managerial philosophy. It will probably only occur in small privately owned firms.

I just attended a meeting as guest, with speaking privileges, of 4 supervisors each only 2 steps below the plant manager and none were over 35 yrs old and the oldest had 5 yrs with the company. None had a mental memory problem but all suffered from the "I don't know would you bring me up to speed syndrome".

I've probably got all of you beat when it comes to working under forgetful supervisors. I worked indirectly with our research and bench scale lab who's director was an older gentleman with I know had 5 PHDs'. The man couldn't remember if he drove the car pool to work or was a rider on any given day. Shortly after I first went to work, not knowing about his memory problems, I was working on a foaming problem with MEA in a Girbitol System so I went to talk to Dr. Bob. His comment was there are a couple of approaches he would like to try but let me think about it and I'll get back with you. I waited several days no answer and I was pulled off that job for other work and I soon forgot about getting the answer. No joke two years later I was walking down the hall and passed Dr. Bob and after he was several yards passed me he turned around and call my name. As I approached I ask what could I do for him. His reply was "that antifoam you ask me about for the MEA system I want you to try Igepal,,, get back with me and I'll tell you which one. Never did.

 

[Slugger926]

My statement comes from experience:

"Your boss has way too much on his plate and isn't delegating enough therefore causing the memory lapses. This is normal with anyone trying to do too much."

This happened to me when I was 27. I was recieving 400 plus emails per day, and resposnsible for 20+ engineers connecting all of our (MCI) new customers to our network nation wide. My phone was ringing non stop from field installers, to customers, to sales, to my own chain of command. It was easy to not remember something small from a subordinate if there wasn't a conformation email from the subordinate.

Memory under high stress has nothing to do with age, and has to do with the capacity at which things can be processed. Just follow your conversations up with confirmation emails and you will be fine. Explain to your boss if he questions it that you are trying to help both of you out and she/he should appreciate it.

 

[unclesyd]

Slugger926,
I was once told by a very astute indivdual that the work load doesn't matter no matter high big it gets; "The real job is deciding what gets done first"

 

[Slugger926]

unclesyd - I agree. In my position, I also had to master the art of telling VP's where they could go, and why we weren't going to work on their projects for 2 or 3 weeks while we took care of higher priority projects.

I have had projects where the President of Engineering was going to come down on my for not starting a project until I notified him the electric service for the building would not be ready for 2 months due to the utility company. With good backing of facts, you can tell most anyone where to go. When I transfered from that group, they had to replace me with 6 engineers and 20 planning engineers and lots of dumb processes.

 

[sms]

I doubt it is Alzheimers, although it could be. I also doubt that he is trying to take credit for your ideas. As a young man I had several bosses that showed this same behaviour. I am inclined to agree with Slugger. This man has way too much going on. I would however keep good records, I would not in any way suggest he see's a doctor. If it becomes that bad, just go find another job.

He may also have something major going in his personal life that causes him to be distracted. A pending divorce? A teenager in trouble? If that clears up the problem may clear up as well.

 

[DouglasCootey]

Since the parent was posted a year ago I can only assume that the issue was resolved since the parent poster didn't return with a follow-up.

I wanted to echo that sending summary memos is an excellent idea. For all you know, this man can't remember unless he visually processes the information. He may not have Alzheimer's, but he may have AD/HD.

However, I wouldn't on any condition recommend that your boss see a doctor for his "condition". That's career suicide.


Douglas Cootey

http://www.cootey.com