good neighborhood, or better job? 2

[ivymike]

I've got a great neighborhood. The commute is long-ish to my office (25 mins in the am, 45 mins in the pm) but there are about 30 neighbors who get together on a regular basis for social activities - we've got lots of kids the same age - and 5 or 10 of us hang out nearly every evening to have a beer or two or excercise while watching the kids. We'd definitely miss the neighborhood. My current job position is a bit demotivating for a variety of factors, and there are few realistic advancement or lateral paths internally in this vicinity.

Semi-official rumor says my next best opportunity is 1100 miles away, starting in about 6 months (same company). It's not a done deal, but more than one manager has mentioned it (it was first brought up 6 mo ago, and discussed more concretely over the last couple of weeks, including target dates). It would be a promotion to a supervisor role w/reporting engineers - the first of two hard jumps before being a "manager" in our internal parlance. This is a bump that some people try to get for 10 years (or even 30 in some cases)... and my manager has already explained that I shouldn't count on "walking" into the role (will have competition), and I should not try for it if I'm not going to take it when offered - then I could count on not getting another one. A big positive is that the supervisory experience would make me more portable in case a need arises in the future (the axe cut deep and missed me narrowly last year).

Wife isn't happy about it, but is willing to pack up and move again (we've only been in this house 26 months)... and we've got another kid due at about the time of the move - the neighborhood "support" would make the whole newborn thing much more manageable. (vs wife home alone w/newborn and older kid, and no nearby friends).

It's a tough one. Do I take the shot while I've got it, and give up the great outside life, or do I postpone any upward aspirations indefinitely to maintain my comfortable living situation?

 

[sdz]

That's not a long commute!
Sounds like you've got great neighbours but I can't tell you which way to jump.
Have you considered moving to another company so you can get better working conditions and advancement?

 

[ctopher]

That is a dilemma.
Think about the kids. Will the new neighborhood be good for them? Is the work site as good or better than the current one?
How is the new work site, is it possible to be purchased or merged (or closed) in the near future?
If you have not been to the new place, take a quick trip there before your decision.
If you like it, go for the position.
Good luck!

Chris
SolidWorks 09 SP5.0
ctopher's home
SolidWorks Legion

 

[IRstuff]

That's something that only you can really decide. Which is more important to you? Clearly, one is currently in better shape than the other. Will a new job really be better for you? Is it worth taking that risk of winding up with both a poor job environment AND a poor neighborhood environment?

Do you really have upward aspirations, or only think you do, or think you should? Personally, I've not found that much satisfaction in managing a team, but your mileage may vary.

Just on the face of it, the fact that you're asking about what appears to be a good opportunity means that you're not terribly hungry for it, despite what appears to be rational reasons for wanting it.

TTFN

FAQ731-376

 

[apsix]

"Wife isn't happy about it..."
Usually life is better when she is happy.

Go there with the family for a weekend and see what you all think.
Try not to get railroaded into a decision by the 'once in a lifetime' talk.

Personally I probably wouldn't do it with another baby due.

 

[rowingengineer]

What are you willing to risk? your personal life or your professional life.

An expert is a man who has made all the mistakes which can be made in a very narrow field

 

[msquared48]

You seem to be saying that a social network and support would not be there if you move. How can you be sure of that?

You stated that the axe just missed you too. Where would you and your family be if if did not miss?

Mike McCann
MMC Engineering
Motto: KISS
Motivation: Don't ask

 

[ivymike]

I've been spending a quarter of my time at that location for the last 7 months, so I'm somewhat familiar with it... although things are completely different when you're someplace just to work vs. there to live.

the move would be from Houston suburbs to a small farm town in the Midwest... I'd go from >30 neighbors in 2 minutes' walk to no neighbors in 2 minutes' walk, and people there tend to be more "private" (or less friendly, to be blunt) so there is no guarantee that I'd be able to get the new neighbors to say hi at all. I've lived in small towns in the midwest off-and-on for the last decade, but this one would be the smallest yet.

A positive would be that my lawn size would most likely go up 40x or more, which my dogs would like.

I've actually been thinking that it's been a few years since I have been happy with my job... that a step backward (away from leadership and back into the "direct contact" design/analysis/test work) might make me a lot happier. The supervisor role might be enough of a change that I could be surprised by it & like it. I'd spent a couple years in marketing before my current position, and I'd really liked some aspects of that job too. If I could advance in a marketing role, I could move up in my current location... but the marketing managers are strongly prejudiced against people w/engineering experience, which makes it much more difficult.

 

[Waidesworld]

Look at it from another perspective and start your spreadsheet. List your pros and cons in two columns. This isn't to see what's pro and what's con but to see which "side" you are yearning to add to...that's your decision on what you want to do.

Aside, I was recently headhunted for a job where we'd definitely have to uproot (>1000 miles) and my wife told me the same as always..."I'll go wherever you want to go". For me though, it's about the financial freedom while I can get it so my child can get the best upbringing possible that we can give him. But I would move for the job, not for the money.

drawn to design, designed to draw

 

[monkeydog]

Why can't you work remotely, with same amount of there that you do now? At least until the baby is born and things settle down?

 

[ivymike]

the new role would be a supervisory role, with a team of about 10 engineers and responsbility for new design and design maintenance of a particular product line...some of my team would be shop support personnel and the rest would be design engineers. being located at the production facility would be critical to success.

 

[Ron]

ivymike...it sounds like you'd be moving to both a smaller town and a smaller work facility. You've also stated that your current position is a bit demotivating and has little advancement potential. Have you considered that those might be company related rather than personal related? Have you considered that if it takes so long to reach a single stepping stone in this company that it will take perhaps another 10 years to take the next step?

If you truly want to supervise or manage, most paths to those jobs are much, much shorter than that. I'm not sure I would uproot my stable and happy family for such a nebulous potential in a smaller division that could be sliced and diced when times get tough (and they will again, probably somewhere near 10 years from now, considering history).

Houston is a big job market...yes, it is suffering like other places at the moment, but when the recovery is farther along, you'll have much more opportunity to parlay your talents into something more lucrative and rewarding...without the trauma of a family move.

Good luck. It sounds like you have a great family life and support system. Be thankful.

 

[ewh]

On the plus side, you'd be out of that humidity! ;-)

"Good to know you got shoes to wear when you find the floor." - [small]Robert Hunter[/small]

 

[plasgears]

In the end your job comes first because that is your support role in the family. Chicago was the pits, but it supported us for considerable time without having to move.

 

[philmech]

Several years ago, I moved from the city to a small town. It turned out not to be advantageous to my career. After a few years, things weren't going so well with the company I worked for, but other options for engineering jobs were slim. I eventually found another job, but it wasn't a lot better. It was either uproot my family again, or stick it out in a mediocer job.

It seems to me that having a great nieghborhood and living in a city where the job opportunities are normally plentiful is an ideal situation.

 

[moltenmetal]

philmech: exactly. I did just that: I managed to find a great neighborhood within an hour's commute by car or transit of a HUGE number of potential jobs. In a city with a very diversified economy. I then said, "There- no need to move for work!"

Fortunately I've had a great job for a long time now, which unfortunately is now at the outer limit of my tolerable commute. It's gotten worse and worse due to increasing traffic from the city to the suburbs- when I started it was easy! I deal with the commute by shifting my hours and telecommuting as often as I can. Yeah, I still need to do a lot of driving, but I bought a fuel-efficient and comfortable car which makes it more tolerable. Where we live, the rest of the family doesn't need a car- that's a bonus.

Do you work to live, or live to work? If it's the latter, does your family feel the same way about YOUR work? Of course you need to move if there's no other way to earn an honest living, but for "career advancement"?! Is that a need or a want on your part? Best to make a list of wants versus needs in your life and figure that stuff out, as nobody else will do it for you.

I LOVE my job, but I wouldn't displace my family to suit the needs of our business, period. That's just me, though. Others LOVE moving around- they thrive on the variety of experiences, meeting new people etc. etc., and more power to them! To each their own. As to the kids- some kids would thrive on the same things I talked about above, while others benefit from the stability and comfort that a home which is truly "home" offers to them.

 

[controlnovice]

I had just the opposite experience between Houston and the Midwest.

Living in the suburbs of Houston, we didn't know any of our neighbors. Sure, we'd wave while cutting the grass, stop for small talk, etc...but nothing to keep us around. I think it was just too stinkin' hot and humid.

I moved to a small town in the Midwest and within one week we're invited into neighbor's homes for dinner, parties, knew all the kid's names by the second week. Real friendly place.

______________________________________________________________________________
This is normally the space where people post something insightful.

 

[apsix]

"In the end your job comes first because that is your support role in the family."

Have we lost something in translation here?
It sounds like the only role of the husband/father is to provide the income, which is obviously not true.

 

[TheTick]

We could be neighbors, Ivymike. Very similar situation for me: good town (eastern WI), good friends, good place to raise kids, supportive wife, and.. dampened career prospects.

I've firmly decided that family is first, and all things serve the family. Kids are job #1. Everything else is support. Sacrifice? Hardly! Putting my energy into the things which are most rewarding and will continue to be so for a long time to come.

 

[plasgears]

apsix,
When you have no job, regardless of the surroundings, the family goes into a tailspin. It all hinges on your ability to bring home the bacon. Chicago for me always provided some kind of professional employment. As I approached retirement, there was an opportunity to relocate to a job with more pleasant surroundings, and we always went on vacation in Michigan. I live there now thanks to a job offer late in my career.